Many of us often find ourselves thinking of things that stir up feelings of fear and sorrow. We have all experienced some suffering in our past, and we often recall our past suffering. We revisit the past, reviewing it and watching the films of the past. But if we revisit these memories without mindfulness or awareness, every time we watch those images we suffer again.
Suppose you were abused as a young child. You suffered greatly. You were fragile and vulnerable. You were likely afraid all the time. You didn’t know how to protect yourself. Perhaps in your mind, you continue to be abused again and again, even though you are an adult now. You are no longer that child who was fragile and vulnerable, with no means of defense. Yet you continue to experience the suffering of the child because you always revisit those memories even though they are painful.
There is a film, an image stored in your consciousness. Every time your mind goes back to the past and you look at that image or watch that film, you suffer again. Mindfulness reminds us that it is possible to be in the here and now. It reminds us that the present moment is always available to us; we don’t have to live events that happened long ago.
Some of us have depression and continue to suffer even if the present situation everything looks all right. This is because we have a tendency to dwell in the past. We feel more comfortable making our home there, even if it holds a lot of suffering. That home is deep down in our subconscious, where the films of the past are always projected. Every night your subconscious goes back and watches those films to dwell in suffering again and again. The future you constantly worry about is nothing other than a projection of fear and desire from the past.
Stretching Always Start From The Inside Out – How Successful People Grow by John C. Maxwell
Get used to stretching yourself. Growth stops when you lose the tension between where you are and where you could be.
- Few people want to stretch.
- Settle for the status quo ultimately leads to dissatisfaction.
- Stretching always starts from the inside out.
- Stretching sets you apart from others.
- Stretching can become a lifestyle.
- Stretching gives you a shot at significance.
Most people have a dream. For some, it’s on the tip of their tongue, and for others, it’s buried deep in their hearts, but everyone has one. However, not very many people are pursuing it. What is stopping them? For that matter, what is stopping you? Most North American people want to lose weight, but they don’t make the effort to do so. I run across people all the time who tell me that they want to write a book, but when I ask, “have you started writing?” the answer is almost always “no.” Instead of wishing, want and waiting, people need to search inside themselves for reasons to start.
It’s wise to remember that our situation in life is mainly due to the choices we make and the actions we take – or fail to take. The older we are, the more responsible we are for our situation. If you are merely average or if you are no closer to your dream this year than you were last year, you can choose to accept it, defend it, cover it up, and explain it away. Or you can choose to change it, grow from it, and forge a new path.
Where do you find the internal impetus for stretching? Measure what you’re doing in relation to what you’re capable of. Measure yourself against yourself. Make a contest of it. If you have no idea what you might be capable of, talk to people who care about you and believe in you. Don’t have any people in your life who fit that description? Then go look for some. Find a mentor who can help you see yourself for who you could be, not who you currently are. And then use that image to inspire you to start stretching.
- Stop looking over your shoulder. It’s difficult to focus on your past and change in the present.
- If you want to grow and change, you must take risks. Innovation and progress are often initiated by people who push for change.
The greatest stretching seasons of life come when we do what we have never done, push ourselves harder, and reach in a way that is uncomfortable to us. That takes courage. But the good news is that it causes us to grow in ways we thought were impossible.
Authentic Transparency – Discovering Your Soul Signature by Panache Desai
How honest are we with ourselves? Do we tell ourselves the truth about our experience, about what we really want and need? How we really feel? We must learn to be profoundly honest, to tell ourselves the truth instead of responding from a place of social conformity or insecurity or lack of self-awareness.
Authentic transparency is the essence of to thine own self be true.” So often, we walk around lying to our selves. We don’t do this consciously. We don’t even realize we’re doing it. We fall into patterns. We go to the party, even though we don’t want to. We agree to a dinner, or a date, with someone who makes us uncomfortable. We are aching to speak up – but we don’t we’re afraid to be rude, or we worry that people won’t like us. Or we’ve simply gotten used to living in a constructed state.
Authentic transparency is not about being transparent to other people. It is, in fact, about being transparent to yourself. We’ve gotten to know our fear, sadness, anger, guilt, and shame. Take baby steps toward loving all aspects of yourself. Consider this: If we were honest with ourselves, how much easier would life become?
Make the commitment to be honest with yourself about what you’re feeling. Fully own it. The funny part is that the very second you have this awareness, it automatically shifts your reality. You begin to see that, in becoming authentically transparent, your relationship to yourself and to everyone around you changes completely, and – I promise you – for the better.
“Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far, I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.” –– Dave Bafry
“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” –– Maya Angelou
“Laughter is the closest distance between two people.” –– Victor Borge
“Mixing humour and harsh reality is a very human behaviour, it’s the way people stay sane in their daily lives.” — Jorge Garcia
“There are two ways of spreading lift: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.” — Edith Wharton
Heather Young, owner of Time for Self
Registered Massage Therapist (RMT) / Yuen Method™/ Holistic Practitioner
Certified Personal Transformation Coach / Alternative and Energetic Medicines
403-358-2362 — Red Deer, Alberta, Canada